I am working the Shit Shift and therefore have no time at all. I am currently trying to work out how to get through all of the DVD's I borrowed, and still fit in tonight's episode of House*.
(*Please note that this is completely imposs.)
Speaking of imposs, I keep shortening words. "That's completely ridick," I'll say. "No, it's imposs," I'll say. And so on.
Speaking of saying, today I had one of those moments where everything went silent and everyone could hear me just as I said "Yes, but my ARSE WILL GET LARGE."
Speaking of arses, the Married Chap from that other post quietly replied, "Oh, you don't need to worry about that," and it was said all jovial and chummy but I couldn't help but think 'hey, go look at your wife's arse, buddy.'
Speaking of... no, shit, I've run out.
Speaking of shit! Ha! Well, toilets really. I went to the loo in a 'I've just arrived at work and I'm a bit out of it' daze and afterwards went out to wash my hands. A lady who was waiting walked into the loo after me and smiled and said hello, and I suddenly thought 'Did I flush the toilet?' Then I completely panicked, because what if I didn't flush the toilet? And it was stupid, because who doesn't flush the toilet? But I was dazed and confused and purply-faced because I was convinced I'd let somebody walk into a cubicle containing an unflushed toilet, and my wee.
There is altogether too much work and sleep and avoiding and work and sleep right now.
(*Please note that this is completely imposs.)
Speaking of imposs, I keep shortening words. "That's completely ridick," I'll say. "No, it's imposs," I'll say. And so on.
Speaking of saying, today I had one of those moments where everything went silent and everyone could hear me just as I said "Yes, but my ARSE WILL GET LARGE."
Speaking of arses, the Married Chap from that other post quietly replied, "Oh, you don't need to worry about that," and it was said all jovial and chummy but I couldn't help but think 'hey, go look at your wife's arse, buddy.'
Speaking of... no, shit, I've run out.
Speaking of shit! Ha! Well, toilets really. I went to the loo in a 'I've just arrived at work and I'm a bit out of it' daze and afterwards went out to wash my hands. A lady who was waiting walked into the loo after me and smiled and said hello, and I suddenly thought 'Did I flush the toilet?' Then I completely panicked, because what if I didn't flush the toilet? And it was stupid, because who doesn't flush the toilet? But I was dazed and confused and purply-faced because I was convinced I'd let somebody walk into a cubicle containing an unflushed toilet, and my wee.
There is altogether too much work and sleep and avoiding and work and sleep right now.
posted by GBE at 8:13 pm
4 Comments:
Oh I always get that feeling! And I swing between grinning and bearing it, except never really knowing if they had to face my by products, and running after them stupidly saying, NO! Stop! I have to just...um....check something.
And the toilet's always flushed.
There seems to be an abundance of neuroses confessions on blogs of late.... must be the change of toilet seats - I mean seasons!
I know what you mean, I guess because it's such a (hopefully) natural reaction to flush, you aren't always thinking of doing it. Worse still is the delimma wether to walk back into the bathroom and check, looking like you forget to flush often, or walk away encounter the problem you discussed.
One of lifes big questions, to check or not to check.
Audrey, you mean other people have these thoughts too? And here I was thinking I was going completely potty.
Potty. Ha.
Marcheline, confessing your neurosis is this season's must-have. It's the new black.
Jen, I think I'll pay more attention to the toilet in future. I mustn't take this toilet business too lightly. Who knows what might happen.
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