Dear Brain,
I don't ask much of you. There's little use for you in the job I do, I only make you read books containing big words for a tiny part of the day, and I let you sit there, happy and numbed by beer, on a pretty regular basis. To my subconscious, or the bit that makes my dreams, all I ask is:
Please stop giving me sex dreams about my co-workers.
Sex dreams are fab. Really they are. But I don't want to walk up to people at work, all familiar and touchy-like, turning bright red and thinking, 'Gosh, how awkward - I wonder what made me shag him, knowing that I have to see him every day at work? This is really embarrassing. OH WAIT. DREAM.'
Brain, if you would like to give me sex dreams, then perhaps they could feature one (or all of) the following people:
Faithfully yours,
girl.blog.etc
I don't ask much of you. There's little use for you in the job I do, I only make you read books containing big words for a tiny part of the day, and I let you sit there, happy and numbed by beer, on a pretty regular basis. To my subconscious, or the bit that makes my dreams, all I ask is:
Please stop giving me sex dreams about my co-workers.
Sex dreams are fab. Really they are. But I don't want to walk up to people at work, all familiar and touchy-like, turning bright red and thinking, 'Gosh, how awkward - I wonder what made me shag him, knowing that I have to see him every day at work? This is really embarrassing. OH WAIT. DREAM.'
Brain, if you would like to give me sex dreams, then perhaps they could feature one (or all of) the following people:
- Colin Firth
- Keanu Reeves
- Natalie Portman
Faithfully yours,
girl.blog.etc
posted by GBE at 7:22 pm
8 Comments:
apologies, with my recent repeated re-viewings of Bridget Jones' Diary, Love Actually and Pride & Prejudice I may have just been the one keeping Dream Colin Firth busy in sleepyland lately.
Rest assured that he'll be free for a while, after the biography-like show I saw today I think I'll turn my attention towards Sound of Music-era Christopher Plummer. at least for tonight, it's all "ooh, Captain von Trapp, I've never seen this side of you!", and Darcy's all yours.
lol (above)
At least you get some action in your dreams. All I seem to find myself doing is organising things. Then, on the rare occasion when my subconscious isn't making me search for something very important that I've lost, I can never seem to get past second base. It's almost as bad as real life.
I have actually had a sex dream about colin firth. He seems to be a bit of a dream slut by the sounds of things.
Dirty boy.
Glad it was in a shower...
I love sex dreams about colleague's.
I especially love the blushing everytime they speak to you, and the complete weirdness (generally during meetings) when you have to remind yourself that although they're great in bed you don't actually know. Because it didn't happen.
ooooh *inhale* awkward... know exactly how you feel... I especially love the helpless guilt feeling as you roll over to the persoon you're SUPPOSED to be dreaming about...
Ooooooh Captain von Trapp! I thought I was the only one?
Hey Mark - come and organise my flat - I can't fix your dreams but you may as well do something useful with that mindset.
Lividia, I may have to view Capt Von Trapp's adventures again in adulthood, because that imagery right now is akin with me rolling about with David Bowie in tight white pants while he says "nothing? Tra la la?"
Mark, I seem to go through sex dream phases. I'll have a few recurring ones, then I'll go back to the usual random shit that's completely pointless and ridiculous but seems to make so much sense at the time.
Phishez, Colin is a big dirty dream whore. I don't know if I want him anymore. Stupid slutty man with his debonair good looks and delightfully plummy accent. If he wants to ignore me, then fine. I'll go dream-shag someone else. Possibly somebody I don't find attractive and work with. Yeah. Take that, Colin.
Lucy, but it's so weird! I start stressing that they're noticing that I'm acting differently, and that they'll see my reddening cheeks and think 'ah HA, she had a raunchy sex dream about me!' and then they'll tell everyone in the office and I'll cry.
Enny, I could probably count on one hand the number of times I've dreamt about an actual boyfriend. It just doesn't happen. I see them all day, so my brain tells them to piss off at nighttime, I guess.
Nails, I really must get onto this Von Trapp business. I seem to be missing out on all the dreamland fun.
yeah! you told him.
I can still keep him can't I?
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