I have recently been drawing myself out of my Queen and David Bowie reverie and attempting to reacquaint myself with Modern Day Music. And I can only conclude that in the couple of years I have avoided the radio, not much has changed, except that Nelly Furtado is no longer so much like a bird as she is like a pouty-faced tart.
I watched Video Hits, which was featuring The Top 100. 'The Top 100 WHAT?' I wondered, as Wheatus's 'Teenage Dirtbag' caused me to become temporarily deaf. The Top 100 songs that have ranked somewhere in the Top 40 over the past few years? The Top 100 randomly-selected songs that MAY have been played on the radio at some point? But no. This was, according to the website, the Top 100 Songs of ALL TIME.
Gee whiz. That Oirish bloke who won that talent show has done well for himself, hasn't he? Straight to the Top 100!
I am going to film myself wailing while I strum my guitar and belch simultaneously and I expect to see myself on next week's show. Ok?
Friday: The Christmas party was Quite Ace, and so very large that it was hosted by a (GASP) prominent radio personality. Oh yes, I go to ALL the big parties. Brushing shoulders, practically. I met a girl who was an incredible nutter, and proved this when her boyfriend handed her a handful of the plastic, sparkly stars that had been scattered on each table, by EATING THEM. She washed them down with her champagne.
How marvellous.
Saturday: A pre-Christmas Dinner of the highest order was hosted, with John playing Chef Extraordinaire and me playing Crap Joke-Cracking, Beer-Swilling Wench. A veritable MOUNTAIN of food was piled onto each plate and it was all very successful, as noone projectile vomited or exploded from Too Much Eating. Hurrah!
And now to face my second week of the new job, and perhaps actually work. Indeed!
I watched Video Hits, which was featuring The Top 100. 'The Top 100 WHAT?' I wondered, as Wheatus's 'Teenage Dirtbag' caused me to become temporarily deaf. The Top 100 songs that have ranked somewhere in the Top 40 over the past few years? The Top 100 randomly-selected songs that MAY have been played on the radio at some point? But no. This was, according to the website, the Top 100 Songs of ALL TIME.
Gee whiz. That Oirish bloke who won that talent show has done well for himself, hasn't he? Straight to the Top 100!
I am going to film myself wailing while I strum my guitar and belch simultaneously and I expect to see myself on next week's show. Ok?
Friday: The Christmas party was Quite Ace, and so very large that it was hosted by a (GASP) prominent radio personality. Oh yes, I go to ALL the big parties. Brushing shoulders, practically. I met a girl who was an incredible nutter, and proved this when her boyfriend handed her a handful of the plastic, sparkly stars that had been scattered on each table, by EATING THEM. She washed them down with her champagne.
How marvellous.
Saturday: A pre-Christmas Dinner of the highest order was hosted, with John playing Chef Extraordinaire and me playing Crap Joke-Cracking, Beer-Swilling Wench. A veritable MOUNTAIN of food was piled onto each plate and it was all very successful, as noone projectile vomited or exploded from Too Much Eating. Hurrah!
And now to face my second week of the new job, and perhaps actually work. Indeed!
posted by GBE at 5:53 pm
11 Comments:
Oh no you don't. I've been here since the start of August and I haven't done any work. If you do something in your very 2nd week I'm so dobbing on you. Yeah, you heard me. Dobbing. On You.
Working on your second week, in the same year as Christmas, what do you think this is?
Good work on the beer wenchery dude, I don't know of any Friday drinks 1pm thing, but I'll see if my homies know what the dealio is.
P.S) John has some mad skillz right there, would you be interested in hiring him out?
i too have noticed the dramatic change (decline?) in nelly furtado
i don't like it. but who cares what i think? not nelly furtado as she counts her money
i don't know why people hate work xmas parties, i love them! there's always some hilarious fool...
a) In respone to last comment: "Crustacean"? wtf?
b) If you record that video I will love you FOREVER. For. Ever.
c) I've discovered Joanna Newsom and Be Your Own Pet. Download 'Cosmia' and 'Adventure' respectively to see if you like 'em.
My memories of Teenage Dirtbag consist of watching unattractive drunk thirty year olds dance and wail to it at weddings.
Also, my office Christmas party was totally crap. We actually did have to pay for our meals and drinks. So, effectively it was just the office going out to a crap pub for an enforced lunch.
Hmmm.. I wonder if she digested the stars or if she will have shiny star spangled poo?
Can you report back on this please.
Our Xmas lunch is this Friday, I am dreading it.
Ride that "not working " wave as long as you can.
Hmmm. . . perhaps you should go back to the Bowie and Queen. Add in some Beatles and The Who and you'll be on your way to some pretty Ace musical listening habits (did I use the word right? I need feedback on this one).
Contrary to your claim of a musical state similar to the one you left a few years ago. . . I really think pop music has gone down hill. Probably the last great pop song was (i'm sorry) Britney Spears' Toxic. Note that there is REAL string sound in the recording. I wish I could say the current popular crowd has done the same. But, never fear, the old fassioned rock opera is back with My Chemical Romance and their Black Parade. A bright. . . or shall I say dark day it is.
Enjoy your week!
Abe -
a) Your use of the term 'ace' was okay, except for it's a bit 80s and you used it to describe the Beatles, when 'most overrated band in history' would have been more grammatical in that case.
b) Toxic is a damn fine song, and anyone who can't see that deserves a sock in the kisser.
c) I haven't heard that particular My Chemical Romance song, but I am definitely raising an eyebrow in your direction.
PS: best word verification ever - ppwienr It's rude also!
Now this may be making too much of the issue, but in regards to point c), what the hell is that song all about? Damned if I know.
Adam, you have homies? I am so jealous. I hope to have government homies of my own soon. I am working on it but I suspect that everyone thinks I am quiet and odd. I was all keen to do work but I am slowly learning that it is not actually expected of me, and trying my hardest to stop. And sure, you can borrow John completely free of charge in return for some magic beans and a tallie in a brown paper bag.
Kiki, maybe the whole hippie I'm Like A Bird thing was the act, and all along she's been covering up her true, tarty self? We were fooled! I guess it's all about whatever rolls in the dosh, and pouting and flashes of abdomen apparently do the trick.
Mars, but that fool is far too often me, you see. I think they're great, though, so long as I'm not the one flashing my boobs or spewing on anyone.
Mark, yes, crustacean. Interesting, and slightly worrying. And I do not yet have a video camera, but as soon as I get one, my wailing video will be high on my list of priorities. I checked out Joanna Newsom and I thought the music was beautiful, but I wasn't so keen on her voice, I'm afraid. Be Your Own Pet are cool! Though I do dislike anyone who is that good when they are in their teens.
Audrey, my new work Christmas party was the same - they gave me some bodgy excuse about not using the taxpayers money to pay for our lunches and boozing. Excuses, I say!
Ilse, funnily enough, the very next thing she said was "I wonder if I will see them in my poo." She was great. I will ask John to investigate the matter and report back ASAP.
MHE, it's tough - I get bored very easily and can only surf the net for so long before I start climbing the walls. I must be one of very few people who actually wants to be given work. As long as it doesn't involve talking to wanky customers all day, I'm set.
Abe, I'll never really leave Bowie and Queen. And I think your use of Ace was Most Ace. I am not sure if I should be ashamed to admit that I quite like that song that Jared Leto sings, whatever it is called.
Mark, I have heard the Black Parade song about a million times, because they play it on the radio every five minutes, and I have no idea what it's about. In the film clip, I think that everyone might be dead, if that helps at all.
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