Tuesday, February 06, 2007

I ventured outdoors to brave the lunchtime crowd after discovering that the frozen lunch I'd brought from home turned out to be a kitchen experiment gone wrong, rather than the marvellous pie I'd been salivating over for most of the morning. Sushi in one hand, giant cookie in the other, and with fifteen minutes to spare I wandered into a nearby bookshop, to enquire about That Book I'd Been Meaning To Get.

American Psycho, specifically. I'm pretty sure that somebody mentioned the book in the comments of this blog, once upon a time, and seeing the movie at Blockbuster the other week had jogged my memory. But this is not altogether about the book, and more about what followed.

I did a search on the little computer terminal thingy to see if they had any copies in stock. "Yes!" said the computer screen, excitedly. Not only on the shelf, but also in the Bargain Bin.

The Bargain Bin! Oh, it's every girl's dream.

"See staff!" yelled the computer, and I complied.

Me: Hi, I'm looking for American Psycho. I just did a search and it said it's available in a Bargain Bin (!) somewhere?
BookMan: [views me with deep suspicion]
Me: Uh. Bargain Bin? On this computer terminal thing?
BookMan: Hmm. I will have a look.

BookMan tapper-tapper-taps away at his keyboard, keeping his eyes firmly fixed on me.

BookMan: And who is the author?
Me: Um, I don't know, I've closed the search down. Bret Ellis som...
BookMan: And HOW do you spell 'psycho'?
Me: Oh. P, S, Y, C, H...
BookMan: OH THERE IS A H, is there?
Me: Ye.. yes?
BookMan: Hmm.

Several moments of awkward silence pass during which time BookMan appears to make no attempt to locate the book in question.

Me: Do... uh, do you hav...
BookMan: Well if it is the book I am thinking of then IT IS BANNED!!1@!
Me: Oh. Banned?
BookMan: BANNED!
Me: Oh.
Random woman to my left: I have a copy. [leans in close and lowers her voice] It's very disturbing.
Me: I've heard that.
Random man to my right: You can buy it on ebay!
Me: Yes. Uh, thanks.
BookMan: We will NOT put it on our shelves! It is BANNED in Queensland!
Me: Yes. Got that. Well, thanks. I have to go back to work now...
BookMan: You will need to look elsewhere! We cannot stock [looks around, takes deep breath] BANNED books!
Me: Um. Goodbye. [turns to the Randoms] Bye. Bye.

Most people pay $24.95, and it turns out that I must pay with Blood! Public Shame! Etc! Jesus, I don't want it that much.

28 Comments:

Blogger colonel eggroll said...

I started to read that book and found I couldn't finish it because it was indeed deeply disturbing. I watched the movie though, which I thought was good.

3:52 am  
Blogger MissE said...

I'm still upset with random woman. The only reason you mention to someone that you have a copy of the book they want is if you're going to offer to lend it to them. Otherwise it's just gloating and irrelevant.

How rude!

And banned? really? Well I never ...

8:40 am  
Blogger Cee said...

When I first read this, I thought "that can't possible be true" and poddled off to the library webpage. But it is! The library has copies, but they're "restricted fiction", whatever that means in a practical sense. Mysterious.

(I've seen the movie, and it made me feel a bit sick, so I've never felt the urge to read the book.)

9:01 am  
Blogger Amanda said...

After thinking, hmm, that's ridiculous (insert minor rant about censorship here), I decided to check the WA Library.

Apparently, there's lots of copies of it. It's not banned, but it can't be displayed on the shelves, and can only be loaned to people over 18. Fair enough I guess.

Now you've got me wanting to read it, just because I can.

12:41 pm  
Blogger Rugby Weather said...

So, not only does Australia have Gun Control, but now censorship. Shame...

1:12 pm  
Blogger killerrabbit said...

Queensland - beautiful one day, Big Brothery the next.

I wonder what other books are banned in QLD? Pride and Prejudice? One Hundred Years of Solitude? The Very Hungry Caterpillar?

Book banning annoys me, even through I have no desire to read American Psycho I would think "Spun Out - The Shane Warne Story" would contain more offensive material than AP.

2:57 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

this 'banning' thing all happened in the 90's - it was in part hyped up by the publishing company... If you were up to date on Brett Easton Ellis and the banning of American Psycho (though it is actually quite easy to find in Qld in non-chain bookstores) then you would know about Lunar Park - his follow up book about the remifications of American Psycho - which is even more disturbing yet darkly brilliant..
in order to get the genius of American Psycho I suspect you have to be a lot more in touch with pop culture - especially that of the 80's and early 90's.

end rant.

4:15 pm  
Blogger Adam said...

BUT THE COMPUTER SAID IT WAS IN THE BARGAIN BIN!


end rant.

5:27 pm  
Blogger Don Quixote said...

In Melbourne American Psycho is wrapped in plastic so that you can't flip through the pages in the bookstore. I'd send you my copy in the mail, but unfortunately in your state IT'S BANNED!

6:00 pm  
Blogger gerl said...

Yeah it's placcie wrapped down here and in NSW too.

You should just saunter over the border to the nearest second hand book store and grab yourself some CONTRABAND.

6:58 pm  
Blogger Miss Devylish said...

Sad.. I thought censorship died w/ the defeat of Hitler.. It seems odd someone would just rant about banned books so loudly.. or is that just in Australia? I mean.. over here in the states even 'My Two Dads' isn't banned.. and you know everyone in the mid-west finds that disturbing. ;)

1:22 am  
Blogger Abe said...

Honestly. . . who bans a BOOK? And one that isn't XXX no less. Whats wrong with people these days?

8:06 am  
Blogger Winter said...

I have a rather self-destructive streak, so telling me that something is banned makes me want to read it to find out why. Now I'm going to have to read it; I've read some out there stuff so I'm curious as to how it compares.

Also, book banning? Weird. And irritating, why isn't that illegal? I move for a global ban on book banning.

11:09 am  
Blogger Adam said...

Whoa! It's just a banning frenzy in here.

5:02 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Seems like Qld is really fucked with banning books. Weird. And I'm sure American Psycho is pretty tame, since heaps of people have read it and liked it.

Anyhow, I read Rules of Attraction and found it OK but not great, so I wouldn't go crazy trying to find a copy of American Psycho. The best dark and cynical book is Morvern Callar, IMHO.

5:53 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/American_Psycho

you are all talking about something that happened over 15yrs ago... time to move into 2007 - the 'OMG they banned a book' conversation based around this book is old news - the book survived and became widely read.

9:26 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I don't think anyone said 'OMG' anonymous, but we're not up on the cool, hip computer speak like you. Kids these days.

I think that it's funny that the man who works in a book store and doesn't know how to spell 'psycho'. Dude, you're surrounded by words all day. DUDE.

Post about being excited for travel, that's far more interesting.

12:53 am  
Blogger GBE said...

Colonel eggroll, I saw the movie a while ago and from what I remember, I liked it too. And now that you've mentioned it, I'm going to have to go and get it from Blockbuster again. I'm keeping that damn place in business.

Miss LaRue, there was actually a pretty big gap between the 'I have a copy' and 'It's very disturbing.' So big that after she said she had a copy and just looked at me I was actually half-expecting her to say 'you can borrow it if you like.' And then I started thinking 'what will I say? Is it ok to borrow books for bookshop randoms? Does this mean we have to form a relationship now? What if she's a messy reader and her copy is all covered in food?' So I was sort of glad she didn't offer.

Cee, I wonder how one gains access to this mysterious Restricted Fiction? I guess I will have to produce ID, perhaps perform some sort of sacred ritual or promise to give them my firstborn. But if they've got it, it may be time to dust off the old BCC Library card.

Amanda, see that's the thing, isn't it. I really wasn't that fussed on reading it at all, but now they've made such a huge deal about it, I must! There is that new Chuck Palahniuk book which is apparently so gross it makes people faint and vomit, and that is allowed in bookshops, so AP must be pretty extreme.

wxguesser, we really don't need guns here, we're all terribly nice people. And my weapon of choice is the scimitar, anyway.

killerrabbit, I think that banning books about Shane Warne would be an excellent idea, and I am going to propose this to the censorship board ASAP. It is a bit sad, though. I think that it's probably a good idea if it's not available for kids to read, but if you're an adult and aware of what you're getting yourself into, then I don't see that it's a problem.

Missy, it is an excellent marketing technique, isn't it? Everyone wants to read a controversial book. I've looked up Lunar Park and that one seems to be pretty freely available, despite its more disturbing status, so go figure. I think I need to find myself one of these non-chain bookshops.

Adam, you make me laugh. And yes, that was my argument exactly. How can they say it's in a bargain bin and then reveal that actually, it's not, and actually, it's not available at all. The FIENDS!

Don, see, this plastic-wrapping seems like a good idea, God knows why we don't do that. Queenslanders are an overly sensitive bunch, obviously. And you can't make an offer like that and then retract it so cruelly! I'll start crying. I am a sensitive Queenslander, you know.

Ilse, ooh, I could be such a rebel. I wonder if they will search me at the border and confiscate the book? "You with the boot full of cannabis, you can go through. You, YOU with the BOOK! HALT!"

Miss Devylish, I think it was the most excitement that BookMan had had in a long time. His eyes lit up with glee. A banned book! He just wanted to make a big deal out of it before he had to go back to customers requesting, well, books that aren't banned. I guess?

Abe, maybe they were particularly sensitive back in 1991. I suspect that if it was released now, it probably wouldn't be banned. I mean, there's some pretty disturbing stuff out there which is freely available.

Winter, oh, now I have another idea to propose to the censorship board. Banning the banning of books. I think they will go for it, do you? And I think that Bret Ellis thingy should give me some dosh for advertising his book and the three extra readers he will have from this post. Yes!

Adam, woah! Woah indeed.

Mark, the internet tells me that The Rules of Attraction was made into a movie starring James Van der Beek, and I, for one, am deeply disturbed. I might check it out, because ok books are better than rubbish books, and I seem to read far too many of those. And I shall pop MC on my list, pronto.

Anonymous! Terribly sorry we're not up on the breaking news from 1991 - I was eight years old at the time, and far more interested in Kylie Minogue and My Little Pony. Curse my mother for not keeping me up to speed with controversial books! And this wasn't a BREAKING NEWS - book banned!!! post, it was actually a NOT-SO-BREAKING NEWS - I'm routinely embarrassed by strangers!!! post. But I'll try to refrain from posting on Old News topics from now on, for your sake. Oh wait, no I won't.

Sarah, I know, and I applied for a job at that bookshop once upon a time and was ruthlessly rejected. I now realise that it was because I can spell psycho, and am therefore unsuitable for the position. And come on now, dodgy posts about banned books are at least a MILLION times better than our South America trip. You know it's true.

9:14 am  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hi GBE, lurker dan here. This bookseller should be shot at dawn! How demented. If you're still keen, give Folio Books on Albert St a ring and ask them about getting a copy. Megan is my contact there, she's very professional and helpful - she actually knows about the books they stock! I have a vague memory of her telling me they can ORDER it for people, but they can't STOCK it...but don't quote me on that. :)

And if you can get hold of it, I thoroughly recommend reading it on public transport/airplane - the horrified expressions from people when they see what *gasp* FILTH you're reading will make you glad you went to so much trouble. ;p

And while I'm blabbing, Glamorama, though I haven't read it, has always been recommended to me as his best novel. It is freely available, and no doubt just as "disturbing".

11:22 am  
Blogger MissE said...

GBE, I just gotta tell you I spend half my time reading both your posts and your responses to people snorting and giggling like an idiot.

Also, this morning I was killing time in a bookshop and they did stock American Psycho, but it was plastic wrapped. I was this close to buying it, just because I can. And if I did, I would have smuggled it across the border to you.

12:00 pm  
Blogger Cath said...

I read American Psycho for the firt time a few months ago and I really enjoyed it! I bought it from a multinational conglomerate book chain (you can guess who), and it was wrapped in plastic. Ironically I am reading a Kathy Reichs book at the the moment, and it is about as graphic. What makes Psycho disturbing is the casual-ness of the violence - oh and his praise for Phil Collins -ooohhhhh!

Read it and form your own opinion. I have not seen the movie, and don't know if I want to, since I enjoyed the book, and it's possibly inconclusive ending. Bret's finest work in my humble opinion!

12:32 pm  
Blogger Rugby Weather said...

I guess my big pain that comes with the "Banned" idea is that the govt actually thinks it knows you better than you know you. At any rate, A good movie, that may well be banned in Australia because certain Video chains in the US have censored it, is "Man Bites Dog". Very disturbing. You should try to find it.

1:36 am  
Blogger SouthOzBloke said...

I love Queensland because I love places that are different. We were told our award ceremony would have to finish by 10pm because "those are the rules here in Queensland".
I read American Psycho years ago and it was a bit disturbing but jeez, banning it. That's one step away from book burning.

2:07 pm  
Blogger GBE said...

Hi Lurker Dan! I think that Folio Books may actually be around the corner from my work. Ooh! And bookshop staff who actually know about books are a rarity indeed. I think your recommendation of reading it when surrounded by lots of people is excellent. I shall try and get it before flying out next week. That, plus a book with breasts or a penis on the cover. Breasts AND a penis. I will ask Megan what she recommends.

Aw, thanks Chesty. And I've gotta say that I'm a bit scared that you're going to slow down with your posting now that you're all employed and stuff, which would make me very sad. What is my day without Chesty LaRue? Sniff. And knowing that you'll smuggle naughty books across the border for me makes me feel all warm and fuzzy.

Cath, a positive vote for American Psycho, hurrah! I imagine I will get around to it eventually. I should probably try and focus on my ever-growing mound of books, which I am continually compulsively buying. I have heard that the movie is not as good as the book (isn't that always the way?) and that it is nowhere near as gruesome. But if you like Christian Bale all slick and suave and highly muscly, it's surely the way to go.

wxguesser, I suspect that this it the way of the world, unfortunately. Man Bites Dog does ring a bell, for some reason. I will ask for it at Blockbuster and wait for the looks of horror, pronto!

SouthOzBloke, I wonder who made this 10pm rule for awards ceremonies? The Awards Ceremonies Curfew Board? It does seem a little silly. Unless it was as noisy as a Robbie Williams concert, which also has to be finished up by 10pm, they say.

7:06 pm  
Blogger MissE said...

Now, this here is a love-in ... *blushes* - I don't see my posting slowing down. In fact, I am anticipating now that I have my high-flying media job, that I will have all sorts of awesome blog fodder that being unemployed just wasn't giving me.

8:06 am  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Heh, James Van der Beek is pretty good in that movie. He punches a blonde girl in the face.

"Chesty's involuntary change" sounds like a great educational short film...

6:08 pm  
Blogger GBE said...

Chesty, excellent! And hopefully you will find that your new job provides loads of blog time instead of none at all (like mine). Though I'm completely paranoid about co-workers finding it so I probably wouldn't blog at work, even if I could.

Mark, Dawson acting tough? Oh, now I must watch it.

8:35 pm  
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2:05 pm  

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